Liberal Conspiracy

I've worked in newspapers and can tell you firsthand, the notion of a liberal conspiracy in the press is outrageous. It's such a maddening amount of work to just get enough stories written on time to fill the paper that we were left with few hours for dark backroom conversations about how liberals could take over the world. The few free hours we had were spent in bars, which, I suppose, could be considered dark backrooms, but I assure you that the only conversations taking place were about the idiots in all the other departments. Plus, it's tough to implement any kind of a conspiracy with the crushing hangovers that were a product of all the bar room conversations.